英语幽默故事【新版多篇】
英语幽默小故事13:A Fine Match 篇一
Onedayaladysawamouserunningacrossherkitchenfloor.Shewasveryafraidofmouse,sosheranoutofthehouse,gotintoabusandwenttotheshops.Theresheboughtamousetrap.Theshopkeepersaidtoher,“Putsomecheeseinitandyouwillsooncatchthatmouse.”
Theladywenthomewithhermousetrap,butwhenshelookedinhercupboard,shecouldnotfindanycheeseinit.Shedidnotwanttogobacktotheshop,becauseitwasverylate,soshecutapictureofsomecheeseoutofamagazineandputthatinthetrap.
Surprisingly,thepictureofthecheesewasquitesuccessful!Whentheladycamedowntothekitchenthenextmorningshefoundapictureofamouseinthetrapbesidethepictureofthecheese!
幽默故事翻译:势均力敌
有一天某位女士看到一只老鼠在自家的厨房地板上窜过。她很害怕老鼠,所以她冲出屋子,搭上了公共汽车直奔商店。在那儿,她买了一只老鼠夹。店主告诉她:“放点奶酪在里面,很快你就会逮住那只老鼠的。”
这位女士带着鼠夹回到家里,但她没有在碗橱里找到奶酪。她不想再回到商店里去,因为已经很晚了。于是,她就从一份杂志中剪下一幅奶酪的图片放进了夹子。
令人称奇的是,这画有奶酪的图片竟然奏效了!第二天早上,这位女士下楼到厨房时,发现鼠夹里奶酪图片旁有一张画有老鼠的图片!
英语幽默小故事14:GardeningGloves
FormonthsIhintedthatIneededanewweddingring,sinceIhaddevelopedanallergytogold.Onmybirthday,whileIwasgardening,myhusbandaskedmeforgdmyhandsupandsaid,“Well,you‘llnoticethatmyhandsarebare.”
LaterthateveningIopenedmypresentwithenthusiasm.“Happybirthday,”hesaid,asIunwrappedanewpairofgardeninggloves.
幽默故事翻译:园艺手套
几个月以来,我一直在向丈夫暗示我需要一枚新的结婚戒指,因为我对黄金有点过敏。生日那天,我正在干园艺活时,丈夫问我想要什么礼物。我举起双手说:“嗯,你肯定看到了,我的两手都是光光的。”
那天晚上,我满怀热情地拆开了丈夫送的礼物。“生日快乐!”他说。我打开一看:里面包着一双园艺手套。
英语幽默故事8. 篇二
Just before graduation from university, my son and several friends were discussing the role their families had played in their career plans. My son, who had been accepted by a college of optometry, had been quiet during most of the talk.
“ How about you, Dale?” one of his buddies asked. “ Was you pushy?
“ No, he replied. “ I had complete freedom of choice. I could be any kind of doctor I wanted to be.”
英语幽默小故事 篇三
Bernie was invited to his friend's home for dinner. Morris, the host, preceded every request to his wife by endearing terms, calling her Honey, My Love, Darling, Sweetheart, etc. Bernie looked at Morris and remarked, “That is really nice, that after all these years that you have been married, and you keep calling your wife those pet names.” Morris hung his head and whispered,“ To tell the truth, I forgot her name three years ago.”
Bernie应邀来到他的朋友Morris家吃晚餐。在朋友家,Bernie发现,不管问他老婆什么问题,Morris总要在每句话的前面加上一些亲密的称呼,象蜜糖,我的爱人,亲爱的,甜心等等。Bernie对Morris说,“你们夫妻俩真够亲密的,结婚这么多年了,你还叫她叫得那么亲密。”Morris低下头,小声地对Bernie说,“老实跟你说吧,三年前我忘记老婆的真名是什么了。”
英语幽默小故事1:Midway Tactics 篇四
rverswaitedformayhemtoensue.
Theretailerontherightputuphugesignssaying,“GiganticSale!”and“SuperBargains!”
Thestoreontheleftraisedbiggersignsproclaiming,“PricesSlashed!”and“FantasticDiscounts!”
Theownerinthemiddlethenpreparedalargesignthatsimplystated,“ENTRANCE”。
幽默故事翻译:中间战术
三个互相争生意的商店老板在一条商业街上租用了毗邻的店铺。旁观者等着瞧好戏。
右边的零售商挂起了巨大的招牌,上书:“大减价!”“特便宜!”
左边的商店挂出了更大的招牌,声称:“大砍价!”“大折扣!”
中间的商人随后准备了一个大招牌,上面只简单地写着:“入口处”。
英语幽默小故事4:Five Months Older 篇五
TheSecondWorldWarhadbegun,andJohnwantedtojointhearmy,buthewasonly16yearsold,enthearmydoctorexaminedhim,hesaidthathewas18.
ButJohn‘sbrotherhadjoinedthearmyafewdaysbefore,doctorrememberedtheolderboy‘sfamilyname,sowhenhesawJohn‘spapers,hewassurprised.
“Howoldareyou?”hesaid.
“Eighteen,sir,”saidJohn.
“Butyourbrotherwaseighteen,too,”saidthedoctor.“Areyoutwins?”
“Oh,no,sir,”saidJohn,andhisfacewentred.“MybrotherisfivemonthsolderthanIam.”
幽默故事翻译:五个月大
第二次世界大战开始了,约翰想参军,可他只有十六岁,当时规定男孩到十八岁才能入伍。所以军医给他进行体检时,他说他已经十八岁了。
可约翰的哥哥刚入伍没几天,而且也是这个军医给他做的检查。这位医生还记得他哥哥的姓。所以当他看到约翰的表格时,感到非常惊奇。
“你多大了?”军医问。
“十八,长官。”约翰说。
“可你的哥哥也是十八岁,你们是双胞胎吗?”
约翰脸红了,说:“哦,不是,长官,我哥哥比我大五个月。”
-
预算管理职责都有什么精品多篇
财务预算管理工作总结范例篇一一学期来,为了认真贯彻党的十八届全会精神,落实科学发展观,解放思想,加强学校财务管理。始终牢记全校工作一盘棋,以学校工作目标为中心,通过群策群力,发挥财务人员的整体力量,全面完成了本期既定的工作目标。努力完善我校财务管理制度,不断...
-
“一”字型排比句40例
“一”字型1.一以贯之、更加坚定地坚持党的领导;一以贯之、更加有效地服务中心大局;一以贯之、更加务实地践行履职为民;一以贯之、更加有力地加强自身建设。2.多一些“代表点题”、少一些“领导定题”,多一些“解剖麻雀”、少一些“走马观花”,多一些“深入一线”、...
-
浅谈双曲面铝板幕墙工程质量控制要点
摘要建筑结构日趋新异,建筑人文环境相宜结合。邛崃市第二人民医院新建项目双曲面铝板幕墙设计还原远古横开挂锁,钥匙端部之意境;为此双曲面异型铝板幕墙质1引言铝板幕墙是近些年常使用的一种建筑外立面幕墙,有着坚固耐用,质感好的优点,但是同时,铝板幕墙的安装工程质...
-
遇见散文(共10篇)
本站小编为你精心整理了10篇《遇见散文》的范文,但愿对你的工作学习带来帮助,希望你能喜欢!当然你还可以在本站搜索到更多与《遇见散文》相关的范文。篇1:遇见散文有关遇见散文光阴似水,横穿岁月,清风涤荡着那一抹朗朗的光景。适才,温暖谦和,瑰丽秀逸的年华,也已足至半...